Who would’ve ever thought I’d manage to land a date thanks to Naomi?

Yeah, it’s ridiculous that I needed her help just to go out with a girl, but that’s exactly what happened — and it was all thanks to the brilliant lie I told Kimberly: that Naomi and I are happily dating.

Everyone knows how it works. A guy who’s happily taken is a harmless guy, and any girl in the world would feel comfortable going out with someone harmless. I guess that’s why Kimberly agreed to go out with me. And honestly, she also seemed pretty happy when Naomi walked up to her at lunch and said: «This afternoon, Jace and I are going to Fifth Avenue for an aperitif and some shopping — he really needs to update his wardrobe. Do you feel like coming with us? At least you can help him buy something decent too.»

Let me get this straight... she dresses like the frontman of a rock band from forty years ago, and she’s the one lecturing me about fashion? And she’s not even the only one — even Veronica keeps busting my balls, telling me to stop wearing nothing but tracksuits and start dressing like a proper, elegant man. But tracksuits are way more comfortable, and no one will ever convince me to wear those damn tight jeans that crush my dick the moment I even get the slightest hint of an erection.

So, was it supposed to be a simple outing, just the three of us — me, Naomi, and Kimberly? No. Wrong. This is where my brilliant idea comes into play.

Kimberly and I are sitting on a bench, me at one end and her at the other, chatting about this and that. Polite questions, routine answers — about as far as you can get from a normal conversation between two people on a date. We’re waiting for my so-called girlfriend to arrive when my phone starts ringing — it’s Naomi calling.

«Hi love, I’m sorry, but something unexpected came up and I can’t make it just yet. You two go ahead with the shopping, and make sure you listen to Kimberly’s advice — she clearly has better taste than you when it comes to fashion! I’ll catch up with you as soon as I’m free, okay? Kisses!»

Oh no. What a shocking plot twist. Who could’ve ever guessed that Naomi would suddenly have an unexpected issue? Talk about bad luck, huh?

Of course, I made sure the call volume was high enough for Kimberly to hear every single word.

«So... what do we do now?» I ask, pretending to be puzzled and caught off guard as I stand up from the bench. I stretch my arms and arch my back just slightly — just enough to lift the hem of my hoodie and reveal a narrow strip of my abs. Just a couple of centimeters — enough to catch a girl’s eye and spark her imagination, but not enough to make it look like I’m some kind of exhibitionist.

That kind of flashy, over-the-top crap only works on middle-school sluts — maybe first-year high schoolers at best. If you want to impress more mature girls, especially a religious nut like Kimberly, you need refinement. You tease discreetly. You intrigue them more with words than with vulgar gestures. You show very little — just enough to make them want to see a bit more.

It’s a foolproof strategy. It’s the one that gets me buried between the thighs of my beloved MILFs, and I’m pretty sure it’ll work just as well on Kimberly too, given how much more mature her mindset is compared to most girls our age.

«Well, um... your girlfriend said we should start shopping,» Kimberly murmurs with a shy smile. «I should warn you, though — I don’t really understand much about fashion. I just hope I won’t make you buy something your girlfriend ends up hating...»

It’s the first time I’ve seen her smile like this — that shy, embarrassed smile she wears as she agrees to stay with me even without Naomi. And damn... she’s fucking beautiful.

That contrast between her angelic, innocent face and that bombshell body — those huge tits, those thighs, that ass that looks like it was made to be slapped all day... She’s like an erotic angel fallen straight from heaven.

«Don’t worry. Whatever you tell me to buy will definitely be better than what she would’ve chosen,» I say, returning her smile. «You must’ve noticed by now that... fashion sense isn’t exactly her strong suit.»

«It’s not very nice to talk about your girlfriend like that,» Kimberly murmurs, shooting me a disapproving look.

Shit — she’s right! I really need to start talking about Naomi as if she actually were my girlfriend... damn it, I’m not used to that.

«Oh, don’t worry. She knows I think that about her. I piss her off a couple hundred times a day, but after a good fuck she always gets over it. That’s probably why she loves me so much,» I grin.

The moment the words leave my mouth, I realize it’s too late. Kimberly immediately turns red as a tomato and lowers her gaze.

«I-I’ll just pretend I didn’t hear that...» she murmurs, clearly embarrassed.

What the fuck, though — you can’t say anything anymore? Then again, considering the religious circles she hangs around, I guess I shouldn’t be surprised.

Come on, we’re just teenagers. It’s not like I told her I murdered someone...

That awkward silence drags on far longer than I expected. It takes a while to break the ice with her — this girl is seriously way too shy. But after nearly an hour of prying words out of her with pliers, she finally starts to relax.

Now she talks a bit more freely about herself, even if she still avoids going too deep into personal details. It’s like she’s afraid that something might go wrong at any moment.

What is it? Is she scared I might assault her? But she thinks I’m taken... or is it because of the rumors going around about me? So she wasn’t being completely honest when she apologized for treating me badly because of those prejudices, huh.

From what little she tells me, she moved to the United States from Greece five years ago. She loves jazz music, collects ancient books, and stays up late reading them. And as if that weren’t enough, she dreams of becoming a world-renowned archaeologist.

Definitely not your average American teenager — and that only makes her more interesting to me. She’s way more fascinating than you’d think just by looking at her church-girl appearance. If anything, that just makes things better.

«Here we are,» Kimberly says, stopping in front of an elegant boutique — one of the most luxurious and renowned in all of New York. Exactly the kind of place Naomi and Veronica would love to see me walk out of wearing brand-new clothes.

Oh well... since I’m here, I might as well rip the band-aid off.

«T-To be honest, I’ve never been in here before...» Kimberly admits, almost ashamed. «Collecting ancient books is a really expensive hobby, and it eats up all my allowance. So I usually just wear whatever my mom buys me. But some of my richer friends say this is the most well-stocked boutique on Fifth Avenue — actually, in all of New York. So... since your girlfriend put me in charge of your outfit, I didn’t really know where else to take you to be on the safe side,» she concludes, flashing that same sweet, awkward smile that drives me crazy.